Managing your Dating Expectations

first date nerves

For mature, over 50 daters, the rise of online dating has meant a total revolution in our love lives. No longer limited to those who we happen to meet in our everyday lives or who our friends happen to think we’d get along with, online dating has meant that we’re meeting new people at a rate that would put younger versions of ourselves to shame.

For this reason, mature online dating is booming. However, just because we’re getting more dates than before doesn’t mean that we’re handling them any better than we did in our youth.

Dating is just as nerve-wracking, thrilling and emotional as it was in our youth and, just like those long days of the past, we all have a tendency to build up our dates to the point of frenzy.

We like to imagine our dates will prove themselves to be the cure for all our ills, perfect in every way. We imagine scenarios where the date goes perfectly and we fall in love by the time we hit the pillow at the end of the night.

Needless to say, that’s not how most dates end up. A date is your chance to test the chemistry of your relationship and, naturally, that means plenty of times when your date simply doesn’t lead anywhere.

It can result in many mature daters feeling disillusioned with the process, but there are things we can do to help manage our expectations and, therefore, enjoy the process just that little bit more. So, what’s our advice?

Don’t Expect the Earth

Beautiful? Funny? Smart? Kind? Interesting? Generous? Worldly? Whatever it is you’re looking for, it’s important to remember that you simply won’t find everything in one person. Expecting as much from your date is cruel on them, so don’t do it.

Instead, take each date as themselves. Get to know them, see what they have to offer and, if you don’t want to see them anymore – don’t. It’s that simple, but if you build up your dates, laying on expectation after expectation, you’ll find that nobody can match up.

Keep it Casual

Early dates are casual affairs, so treat them as such. Spending a full day preparing, daydreaming and hoping hikes anticipation levels to heights which are hard to manage.

Keep your mind clear and your options open. It’s just like going to meet somebody for a cup of coffee; perhaps it’ll come to something, but more likely it’s simply a nice chance to get out of the house and have a little lively chat.

Reserve your Opinion

Online dating gives everyone the chance to chat for as long as they’d like before they meet up. Sending message after message back and forth, it’s easy to feel like you really know somebody.

However, whilst messaging online is a great way to get a feel for what a person is like, it’s not a perfect indicator of what they’re like in person or what your chemistry will be like. So, reserve your opinion on somebody until you’ve met them, otherwise you risk a jarring moment when your perception meets reality.

Want to meet that special somebody? Up until the end of April, we’re offering 40% off on every subscription package at Maturity Dating using the code SPRING40! So, sign up today and find love sooner.

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